Key Facts
- Word: 썸 (sseom), noun, loanword from English "some"
- Register: casual, colloquial; very common among young people
- Senses: talking stage (before officially dating), situationship
Talking Stage in Korean: What Does 썸 Mean?
썸 names the stage when two people text daily, meet up and feel something, but have not said they are a couple. Unlike 짝사랑, one-sided love, a 썸 is mutual: both sides sense the attraction. The set phrase is 썸을 타다, literally "ride a 썸", and the people involved are 썸남 and 썸녀. The word also appears in 썸에서 연애로, the step from this stage to an official relationship. It is informal, so use it with friends and not in formal writing.
How Do You Pronounce 썸?
Say sseom, one syllable. The ㅆ is a tense s with no breath, and the vowel ㅓ is unrounded, so keep your lips relaxed. The word ends in ㅁ, and with the object particle 을 it links, giving sseo-meul. Close your lips for the final ㅁ without adding an extra vowel after it.
Example Sentences with 썸
우리는 아직 썸 타는 중이에요.
urineun ajik sseom taneun jungieyo
We are still in the talking stage.
타는 중이에요 means "is in the middle of riding". 아직 means "still", so the couple has not yet made it official.
요즘 그 사람이랑 썸을 타고 있어요.
yojeum geu saramirang sseomeul tago isseoyo
I am in a talking stage with that person these days.
이랑 means "with", and 타고 있어요 is the ongoing form. The sentence reports a current situation.
썸에서 연애로 이어지는 경우도 많아요.
sseomeseo yeonaero ieojineun gyeongudo manayo
Many talking stages turn into relationships.
에서 and 로 mark the change from one stage to another. 경우도 많아요 means "there are many cases".
Common Phrases and Collocations
Fixed partners for 썸 are short and common.
| Korean | Meaning |
|---|---|
| 썸을 타다 | to be in a talking stage |
| 썸남 | guy you are talking to |
| 썸녀 | girl you are talking to |
The Mistake to Avoid
Learners reach for the wrong verb because English says "have" or "do".
Wrong: ✗ 썸을 하다 (doing a 썸)
Correct: ✓ 썸을 타다 (literally "ride a 썸")
The natural collocation is 썸을 타다. Swapping in 하다 sounds unnatural to Korean ears.
썸 Compared with Similar Words
These words describe different points on the romance timeline.
| Word | Meaning | How it differs |
|---|---|---|
| 연애 | dating, romantic relationship | An official relationship; 썸 comes before it. |
| 짝사랑 | one-sided love | Only one person has feelings; 썸 is mutual. |
| 데이트 | date | An outing; it does not say what the relationship is. |
Where Does the Word Come From?
썸 comes from the English "some", as in "something is going on", spelled with a tense ㅆ. The exact wording of the etymology varies between sources, so it is best treated as a popular explanation.
At a Cafe: Are You Two Dating?
Two classmates are catching up over coffee. Jiyun has noticed that Hana keeps meeting Minsu. They use polite endings, even though the topic and the word 썸 are casual.
Jiyun
요즘 민수 씨랑 자주 만나요?
yojeum minsu ssirang jaju mannayo?
Do you see Minsu often these days?
Hana
네, 주말에도 같이 카페에 갔어요.
ne, jumaredo gachi kapee gasseoyo.
Yes, we went to a cafe together at the weekend too.
Jiyun
두 분 사귀어요?
du bun sagwieoyo?
Are you two dating?
Hana
아직은 아니에요. 썸 타는 중이에요.
ajigeun anieyo. sseom taneun jungieyo.
Not yet. We are in the talking stage.
사귀어요 asks whether they are dating as a couple. Hana answers with 아직은, “not yet” or “for now, no”, then names the stage they are actually in. Saying 썸 타는 중이에요 avoids presenting Minsu as her boyfriend. It also leaves the future open: she has not said they will definitely become a couple.
What Do the Set Phrases Tell You?
썸을 타다 is a fixed expression. The literal “ride” does not describe transport or a physical action. In casual speech, people often leave out 을 and say 썸 타다; the first example above does this too. Keep the space between the noun 썸 and the verb 타다.
썸남 and 썸녀 name people by their role in this uncertain stage. The endings 남 and 녀 indicate a man and a woman. Neither word means an established boyfriend or girlfriend, and neither is normally used to address the person directly. They are labels you might use when telling a friend about someone.
“Situationship” is a useful rough translation, but it can suggest a longer or more complicated arrangement in English. 썸 focuses on romantic interest before an agreed relationship. It does not specify physical intimacy, exclusivity or how long the situation has lasted.
Where Will You Hear 썸?
In romance dramas and dating shows, 썸 helps speakers discuss attraction before anyone makes a relationship official. Friends may use it when discussing frequent messages or repeated meetings. Those actions can suggest attraction, but the word expresses someone's reading of the relationship; it cannot establish what the other person feels.
A polite ending does not turn 썸 into formal vocabulary. Hana's reply above is polite enough for a classmate she is not close to, while a formal account of a relationship would usually need more explicit wording. Asking a colleague about their 썸 can still feel personal, even with 요 at the end.
Related Words for the Next Stage
| Korean | Meaning | One useful distinction |
|---|---|---|
| 호감 | favorable feeling; attraction | Interest in someone, without claiming a relationship. |
| 고백 | confession of feelings | In a romance context, openly saying you like someone. |
| 사귀다 | to date; go out with | In a romantic context, being a couple. |
| 남자 친구 / 여자 친구 | boyfriend / girlfriend | Names a partner once the relationship is established. |
The dating vocabulary lesson teaches the steps around 썸, including 고백 and 사귀다. A confession is an action; becoming a couple needs a response, so the two ideas are distinct.
Quick Self-Test
- Which verb completes 썸을 ___: 하다 or 타다?
- Does calling someone 썸남 mean he is already your boyfriend?
- Which word describes one-sided love rather than mutual interest?
Show answers
- 타다. In conversation, 썸 타다 also works without 을.
- No. 썸남 names a man in the stage before an official relationship.
- 짝사랑. 썸 describes perceived mutual attraction.
Frequently Asked Questions
What is the talking stage in Korean?
It is 썸 (sseom), the stage before two people officially date.
What verb goes with 썸?
Use 타다: 썸을 타다.
How is 썸 different from 짝사랑?
짝사랑 is one-sided; 썸 is mutual attraction without a label.
What are 썸남 and 썸녀?
They are the guy and girl you are in a talking stage with.
Related Words and What to Learn Next
- Theme list: Korean Gen Z slang groups 썸 with other slang young Koreans use.
- Index: browse Korean words A to Z for more words like talking stage.
- Practice: add 썸 to your vocabulary flashcard decks.
- Compare: 연애 is the official relationship that a 썸 may become.